Why You Missed My Wedding:
a) you slept thru your alarm because you hadn't slept in 2 days
b) you drank so much for free while gambling that you decided it was a better idea to get a tattoo AND a piercing instead
c) you burned yourself so bad at the pool that it hurts too much to wear clothes
d) you were busy explaining to management why you were caught naked at the ice machine and that NO you are not a prostitute advertising your goodies
e) you somehow made it to the finals for the Fat Elvis of Fremont Impersonation Contest without even entering
f) you gambled and lost our wedding gift money and was too busy trying desperately to win it back...along with your kids' college tuition
g) you were arrested for stealing chips to pass off as a wedding gift
h) you couldn't post bond
i) all the above
b) you drank so much for free while gambling that you decided it was a better idea to get a tattoo AND a piercing instead
c) you burned yourself so bad at the pool that it hurts too much to wear clothes
d) you were busy explaining to management why you were caught naked at the ice machine and that NO you are not a prostitute advertising your goodies
e) you somehow made it to the finals for the Fat Elvis of Fremont Impersonation Contest without even entering
f) you gambled and lost our wedding gift money and was too busy trying desperately to win it back...along with your kids' college tuition
g) you were arrested for stealing chips to pass off as a wedding gift
h) you couldn't post bond
i) all the above
up for sale by melmar at 3:53 PM
1 Comments:
What about:
You're stuck in stinkin' Tokyo and airfare to fly to Vegas for the weekend costs like $7000, you don't have a hot date and you have to work anyway -- but you'll be kicking yourself for missing such a sizzlin' good time.
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